Dreaming for answers?

Cancer gives you odd dreams. I've always been odd ;) but oddness seems to be a bit more acute these days. Things don't seem 'right'; everything is a bit skewed. My world is more illusory than ever now as I go through life as a 'cancer patient'.

As you may be well aware by now if you know me at all or just read this Blog, I'm a Star Trek geek and relate most things to Trek in one way or another. It's just such a great philosophy and as a friend once said about it; "A great work of fiction (such as Trek) is composed of many truths and it resonates with us". That is what makes Trek so great for me. That and the whole idea of going "where no one has gone before".

So the other night I had a wierd dream wherein Trek figured in a way I never thought it would.
I dreamt I'd died and was suddenly in a white room with what seemed like nobody there. It was basically the same scene from the Star Trek: Next Generation episode "Tapestry" where Picard dies and Q allows him to relive his life. When Picard dies Q is there and claims to be god. It's quite a funny scene and it was almost how I thought my dream would play out; I thought I was going to run into Q.
However, as I step forward there is someone there and it is the Metron from the Original series episode "Arena". I'm still confused considering I've just died and still trying to figure out WTF? :o I ask "who are you?" and he tells me he's the "Skeptic's God". He's very nonchalant about everything and makes no big deal about the fact I'm dead and here discussing things. I go along with this figuring he must be telling the truth (for some reason I just knew he was).

I ask him point blank; WTF?!?! Why the hell did I get cancer!? Why does bad stuff happen!? He just basically said he made the Universe with all its laws and rules such as gravity and evolution and thermodynamics and just left it do its own thing. He has nothing to do with it any more and made no big deal about anything. He asked me what I wanted to do now; do I want to be reborn as some other life form, do I want to go play a game with him. The only thing I couldn't do was go 'back to life' since the laws of the Universe don't work like that and even god can't change what he made. I wanted to know if he was the "Skeptic's god" were there others? but the question seemed irrelevent.

I always figured that religion as portrayed in Erik the Viking was bang on; the Vikings believed in Valhalla so they found it; but the missionary was a Christian and didn't see the walls of Valhalla when they got there. It didn't exist for him! That silly movie gave me an epiphany way back in highschool when I watched it for the first time and it made me realise that that is probably the closest thing to the truth anyone has ever realised.

So I figured meeting the Metron/skeptic's god in this immediate after-death state could be an outcome for me. It's not that I expected there to be a god; but he was like a portal; giving me options but not making any judgements. I've often said too that if there ever was a god; he's 'long since left the building'. Maybe this is what I meant? And given the choice; I will take rebirth. One wonders why I'd torture myself again, but despite Dukkha life still has much to offer and we should all strive to be better and go where no one has gone before........